Well no and no. No full update and the old file isn't there. But those were two good ideas. I'm kind of baffled how uninstalling and reinstalling postfix didn't fix the problem. That is, take care of the linking. As it stands, I'm on a VPS and make an image before upgrading packages. But I will hack a bit more. Nice thing about a VPS is I can buy a second one, restore there, then play around with the broken one.
I should point out that the start of my problems began with doing an upgrade on boost-lib, which did an install of postfix. My fault for not saying no.
I don't let pkg update everything since I hate breaking email. There are so many programs to work together to make an email server.
--------------------
update:
I did a make clean in the postfix port and reinstalled. That seems to have fixed the problem, but it seems to me ports should have detected the lib issue. I had to postmap all the db files.
portconf seems to be missing, but now that I have email again, I will check with the postfix group.
I'm going to sit back a bit before declaring this solved.